Non-Violent Resistance (NVR): A Structured Approach for Educational Psychologists

As educational psychologists (EPs), we are often called upon to support children and families experiencing high levels of conflict, control, or withdrawal. In such cases, traditional behavioural strategies may fall short.

The Non-Violent Resistance (NVR) approach offers a trauma-informed, relational alternative that prioritises adult presence, emotional regulation, and systemic support. It provides EPs with a thoughtful and ethically grounded framework for supporting families experiencing entrenched difficulties.

We recently hosted an AEP webinar on NVR, delivered by Deputy Principal Educational Psychologist, Carina Embeita, who also works as a family therapist and MVR practitioner, and is currently an honorary research fellow at UCL. Carina covered the background and concepts behind NVR and how these can be used in EP work.

What is NVR?
Developed by Haim Omer in the early 2000s, NVR supports parents and carers of children presenting with violent, controlling, or self-destructive behaviours. Rooted in the principles of peaceful resistance, the approach helps adults resist harmful behaviour without resorting to punishment or withdrawal.

Rather than focusing on changing the child’s behaviour directly, NVR strengthens the adult’s self-control, presence, and relational influence. Widely used across Europe, it is increasingly adopted by CAMHS, parenting services, and EPs in the UK.

NVR is grounded in key psychological and systemic concepts:

• Parental Presence: Re-establishing consistent, caring adult involvement.
• Attachment and Anchoring: Supporting emotional stability, especially in adolescence.
• Systemic Support: Building a trusted network to reduce secrecy and isolation.
• Escalation Awareness: Disrupting patterns of conflict or appeasement.

NVR promotes authority rooted in self-regulation and relational strength - not fear or control. It shifts parenting focus towards presence, reflection, openness and reconciliation. The approach offers structured strategies that EPs can explore with families, including 'Behaviour Baskets', reconciliation gestures, de-escalation strategies and establishing support networks.

Once the foundation is in place, NVR introduces more structured actions. These tools are used carefully, within a context of emotional safety and support.

NVR can be used effectively in EP Practice, offering:

• A clear structure for formulation-led casework
• An alternative to punitive or control-based interventions
• Acknowledges attachment theory, trauma-informed, and restorative models
• A means to build parental capacity while reducing escalation

EPs can apply NVR directly with parents or incorporate its principles into consultation and multi-agency planning.